Stunning

Sometimes, people just leave you with your mouth hanging open. And then you have to vent.

I was recently told that we could not use one of the names that we're thinking about for our boy, because he'd get beaten up for it. It was a name that, when I suggested it, my husband did not write off as a sissy name, like he has one or two others I've casually thought about.

Our VERY short list is William and Joshua, but the slightly longer version still includes Levi (not sure if we've really agreed or if that one's just on my list) and, the terrible name that "YOU CAN'T name a kid": Winston. The middle name, no matter which we choose, will be Jake, in honor of our sweet nephew who went to be with the Lord three years ago. Well, the way this person protested, you would think I had said we were thinking of naming our BOY Jennifer or Katy. Or Fart.

The source telling us that name should not be used (who, to be quite fair, didn't know it was on our short list) comes from such a different world than I do; a world where guilt is a tool (which is okay with me because I don't really do guilt-I made that decision in my late teens and have never regretted it), and where waiters will spit in your food if you even nicely complain about it and kids, apparently, don't like the name Winston. I know it is not entirely people's faults when their minds work that way. It is the kindness and grace of God that continues to teach me (and I know will some day teach them) not to be that way!

It's not that nobody's ever been ugly to me. It's not that I've never seen someone be teased because of their name; I've even been teased for my weird spelling more than you would think. It's not that I can be sure that no waiter has ever spit in my food. I try to treat most people in a way that would prevent them from feeling a need to spit in my food though, and maybe this person has not tried that. I don't know... There is just so much beauty in the world, and it strikes me so often that I just feel a lot of joy, and then I don't think about all the ways that someone could hurt me. I don't think about anyone beating up my kid, and if someone does, I'll cross that bridge with the Lord's help when I come to it.

Anyway, about names, I've heard that one has to develop a thick skin about these sorts of things because many people have strong personal opinions about all things relating to child-having and parenting. My feelings aren't hurt, as much as I am just sad to remember that there are really people who come from mindsets like that. My husband doesn't mind it at all. He has a knack for doing what he knows is right without being rankled by people who disagree with him.

Anyway, since I just made our list of names a bit more public, I should say that I'll be happy if they're names you like, and if you don't, then you can have a better day by feeling grateful that I am not naming your child. See? Everybody's happy!